Ep 178 - Integration: THE skill for authentic leadership

You can learn, train, reflect and grow—but if you don’t integrate, nothing sticks. In this episode, I talk about what integration really looks like, how to apply it to your emotional and leadership growth, and why it’s the missing link in most coaching and workplace systems.

Listen to or watch episode 178 of the Get Jasched podcast now.

#leadership #wellbeing #integration #authenticity #leadershipdevelopment

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Transcript

Hey, everyone, welcome to another episode of Get Jasched.I am your host, Jess Jasch. Today we are talking about integration, what it is, what it means, why it's important in leadership, but also in how you experience well-being.So a few weeks ago we had an episode about embodiment and what embodiment is. this is a useful episode on its own right, so you don't have to listen to that one first. but if you did listen to it, this is a good follow-on from that, because we spoke about embodiment. and how do you come into your body? integration is this real skill in about not doing more but bringing more of yourself together, and we use embodiment todo this.So in leadership, in business in particular, but also in wellbeing, yeah, especially in wellbeing, leaders or people often chase like tactics.But integration is that underlying skill that changes how all of the other skills actually land and work together.So integration is bringing together different parts of self, knowledge and practice into a unified whole.So think of how the human body works. right,The human body works.Wait, if we look at,If we look atthe lungs,We, if we look at the lungs in a silo, we see: oh God, I'm really relying on my limited biology knowledge in this way.But if we look at the lungs in a silo, if we just only focused on the lungs, we go: oh, that's how we get oxygen.But we have no context of how oxygen actually serves us and what it does in the blood and what it does inin relation to the blood being pumped around and how it relates to the heart that pumps the blood around. see how, like there's always a bigger picture, and if we integrate the human body as a whole, it's this miracle machine. but we can see at least better how it all works together. but if we focus on the only one, then it's like: well shit,that's confusing, that doesn't make sense or that doesn't serve us in a way that is important.So in our experience, integration is like head, heart and body.So it's thinking, feeling and being, not just thinking.not just feeling, because when we just feel it's overwhelming. but if we just think, then we're stuck up here, if we're just being, but without thought or feeling, are we being? so it's thinking, feeling, being it's personal values and your professional role, integrating those- and we're seeing it more and more and more in today's world- um,about who we choose to work with, who we choose to surround ourselves with who we choose who or what, like companies we choose to invest our money into.It's all. that's all integration, our personal values with our professional roles or their professional roles, our internal awareness and external impact.This one's really important.I always say we can't have professional development without personal development, and the reason for that is professional development without personal development is so empty. it means we don't have an awarenessof our impact. we just think we're succeeding. but if we have this internal awareness of how we have an external impact, that integration is going to be really powerful and how you feel about the work you're doing, but also how others experience the work that you're doing right. so that is a really really key part of how integration can show up in.It's tied to neuroscience.Daniel Siegel's work on mindset and integration says that healthy brains integrate differentiated parts.So that's what leads to resilience and adaptability.So our healthy brains. when we can integrate all of the differentiated parts of the brain, that's when we can act as a whole right.So there's a lot to be said for it.The reason it matters in leadership is:Without it, without integration, leaders are often fragmented, both in their experience, in their experience, but also in others' experiences of them.So they are reactive,they are inconsistent, they are siloed and they don't help with that.So silos can happen between people and departments,And it's not helpful.It's often one of the biggest complaints in terms of overall company organization structure is people are like we're just siloed, we don't really know what anyone else is doingAnd we're not working together.So without integration that is fragmented, more stressful, more frustrating for people.With integration leaders in particular show congruence, the connection of all alignment and genuine authenticity, not attempts at authenticity or feigned authenticity, or authenticity that comes from what they read out of a bookthat they follow. that becomes very obvious that, oh, you're doing what the book told you to do. um, but real authenticity, and that builds trust and influence. um, again, not for the nefarious purposes to control or manipulate, but just genuine trust and connection and influence. um,and, and that makes a difference, because you can always. well, I was going to say you can always, you can't always, not everyone can, but I, in my experience, I feel like I can always sort of tell if someone'smeaning what they say, if there's a genuineness there and I, and if and if there doesn't feel like there is. it doesn't mean that they're not genuine, just means I'm missing something. there's some information I'm missing, but you can tell when there's a genuine, when there's a grounded oh, this is who this person is,and there's an integrity in what they're saying. so integration as a practice and a habit and a way of being is really, um really, really helpful in how you experience your work and your life.So in positive psychology, integration supports coherence in meaning making.So that speaks to self-determination theory, which is autonomy, relatedness and competence,RightAutonomy.But we have this,This say over what we're doing or this, this our own self-authority over what we're doing.Relatedness is in connection, competence, feeling like we're capable of it.And integration helps us to feel that coherence, feel that clarity in how we make meaning about our experience in that way.So if we look into the research around it and the science behind it- I mention this a lot because it's relevant. but Fredrickson's broaden and build theory.So when leaders integrate emotions and perspectives, they access broader thinking and resource building.That's so good.Like why are we sleeping on that?When we integrate our emotions and our perspectives, not just have perspectives and be at the mercy of our emotions, but integrate it, we have more access to broader thinking and resource building.Incredible,This is what we want.Goleman's emotional intelligence research indicates that self-awareness and regulation and empathy can only create impact when integrated into practice.So our self-awareness cannot create an impact when it's not integrated into practice with regulation. with empathy,Our regulation skills arecannot create impact when integrated in practice with self-awareness and empathy.Our empathy skills are limited significantly when we don't have self-awareness or regulation, because those things help us develop empathy.So that is really really key.And then there's polyvagal theory, which is the integration of nervous system awareness helps leaders to regulate themselves and co-regulate teams-co-regulation. so we had stacy louise on a few weeks ago as well, talking about co-regulation and how this nervous system awareness and learning to regulate ourselves, especially as adults, helps others to co-regulate, which helps set the tone for teams, for connections, for relationships of any kind.So integration again is a really really useful key part of what we're doing here.What it looks like in action is leaders.Let me say what it doesn't look like for starters.hustling, overdoing, overdoing, overdoing, that is disintegration.That is incongruent.That is disintegration.Leaders who talk a big game about the importance of mental health, because it is important, but then spend a lot of their time verbally criticizing often strangers on the internet instead of focusing on their own light.And there is a difference in giving useful feedback versus justborderline being a little bit of a troll that contributes to poor mental health, we know this, that is disintegrated.not disintegrate, disintegration, right?So that is an example of what it doesn't look like.What it could look like is a leader who, you know, is confident, but also able to be vulnerable, able to say, hey, I'm not sure about something, right?Able to admit they are fallible, right?Like leaders who are integrated and balanced confidence with not needing to be infallible with able to go, I have something to learn here.That is integrated leadership.And that is incredible leadership.In conflictwhen you are able to balance using logic empathy and presence that is an integrated way or approach to conflict where it's not just this is the logicfuck how you feel when it's not just, oh my God, you feel this without looking at logic and presence and dysregulated yourself.It's not about, oh, I'm present, but I'm not really paying attention.It is using logic, empathy, and this mindfulness practice of presence.That is a great way to approach conflict.A great way to communicate, especially through challenge.So when your words, your actions and your presence all say the same thing, all convey the same message, all match up.People feel that and they believe that.And then they trust that.And again, that is an attempt at trust-building that is not in order to manipulate, because think about how you trust.You trust when people's words, actions, and presence say the same thing.Or maybe you need to look at how you trust people or groups, even politically.Are their words and actions and presence saying the same thing as each other?Or are you just trusting based on words only without actually looking at whether actions in particular match what someone say they do or say they stand for?Right.So really, really consider this, but also consider it as an importance in how you feel connected with the people around you withwith who and what you vote for with how you build relationships at work how you build those connections how you build relationships in your personal life how you genuinely connect here so some practical approaches to how do we integrate is it just a thing to say i'm integrating i'm integrating i'm integrating is it how do we actually integrate how do we actually do thisWe can use daily reflections.A check-in.Whether you write it down, whether you pause and just answer these questions to yourself, however you need to, but actually doing it.Daily check-in.What am I thinking right now?What are the most common thoughts I'm having in the last 24 hours?What tone are they?Are they useful in the tone that they are in?Even if the basis of the thought might be useful, is the tone useful?Is the tense useful, right?What am I feeling?What am I sensing?There are many different ways to do this, but it could be just a body scan.What am I noticing in my body?Or to help direct your brain a little more, where am I noticing tension in my body?Okay, cool.Where am I noticing relaxation in my body?What am I sensing inside?If you're not sure of the wording of what am I feeling, it could be, what does it feel like?Like this, like a clenched up fist.Or does it feel a little wavy?Like anything, right?Whatever helps you.There are practices, embodiment practices.that help us integrate because integration isn't uh we get to a certain point then we can tick the tick the box it's just not how it works but we can practice embodiment so it becomes more of a way of being so ones that have worked for methat taught me a lot about doing it for myself is yoga, breathwork, movement, dance.Not choreographed dance, more like flow, movement, embodiment dance, mindful walking,which reconnects mind and body.And I say mindful, sometimes we just need to, you know, do what we can to move our body.But I am a big advocate forGoing on a walk outside without your headphones, and I don't mean by listening to something on loudspeaker annoying everyone.If you're listening to something, please fucking use headphones.But isn't at everyone, obviously.But going outside, going for a walk, walking the dog, walking yourself, whatever, however it is you need to do it, and not having to have more information aboutcoming into your brain, right?Like, I love podcasts.I have a podcast.I love podcasts.I love audiobooks.I'm writing a book.I love books, right?Like, this isn't shitting on those things.And sometimes we get so caught upin trying to just absorb all of the information, all of the information, all of the information, that we're not actually giving ourselves a chance to check in with what the fuck we think and feel about things.We're not really processing, which is absorbing, absorbing, absorbing, which becomes absorbing only other people's stuff when we don't give ourselves the chance to actually just reconnecting with us.which could be going for the walk, that movement just moves things.You don't even need to be actively focusing on what am I figuring out about this, but you are then integrating all of the information that you maybe have absorbed that day or week from the different podcasts or whatever that you listen to.But just being in your own experience.And what is that experience?Reconnecting your mind and body going, oh, seeing what comes up, seeing what thought process you're moving through or changing or shifting based on what you've learned or becoming even more sure of based on what you've heard.right so these things are so important it is so important to give ourselves opportunities to just become aware of what we are actually thinking feeling ourselves so that we can not have unconscious actions behaviors or thoughtsruling our lives because we haven't taken the time to actually check in with what is driving those thoughts actions behaviors so embodied practices it doesn't have to be yoga if you heard me say yoga and you went gross or whatever you feel about it doesn't it doesn't have to beBut I mean practices that don't have external information coming in.So, like, usually when we go to the gym, there's music or there's something in the areas, right, and that's fine, that's good, whatever.But I mean practices that are embodied for you, that are bringing you into you, not doing it while you're fucking listening to other information.so it's letting yourself inquire into your own experience whatever that is gardening can do that surfing does that i hear i don't surf but you know that's the main thing i hear from people who do surf they're like i just feel so present feel so connected with my bodyThat's an embodiment practice.That's great.So whatever that is, gardening can be one.If you let yourself do it again without that external noise or information because you're present, you're physically present too.you're gardening, you're physically present, you're using your body.So it doesn't have to be on a yoga mat, on top of a mountain, whatever it is.Hiking is a good one too, personally.So really consider how you can do any of these things in any dose or quantity.Leadership routines.Oh, I love this one, actually.Leadership routines is starting meetings in a certain way.So with both your goals and your values or intentions, which is like your head and your heart, for example.One thing, particularly when I was in an internal leadership position, Istarted meetings, we'd have weekly meetings.There were a few different kinds of meetings, not over the top, but each meeting, each weekly meeting we started with was for ease of wording, it waswhat's your celebration for the week and if celebration felt a little out of touch it's a what are you appreciating for the week or what's your honorable mention for the week and it's getting people to kind of sit into their experience and we're not putting anything on a pedestal of oh if i don't have a celebration i'm failing but it's a ohappreciation or honorable mention.Well, when this happened, I got to do this.Or when this happened, I felt this.Or when this happened, I learned this, right?So that was always a key thing that we started with that helped us integrate our actual experience rather than just coming into the weekly meetings going, fuck, now there's all these other things to do and feeling like we're constantly behind, behind, behind.So it was this acknowledgement, but from this experience, not, not here's the things I did, but what are the appreciations or honorable mentions or even celebrations?Self-story work.What stories do you tell?Especially about your own experience.So like reframing your past challenges by integrating those lessons into your current identity, your current leadership identity.What does that mean?And how are you telling that story?Or are you just using it as examples of challenges that brought you down?It's reframing your relationship with those challenges.And there is like all of this, everything, there is a ripple effect that happens.There is a ripple effect that happens through doing this.Teams, team members, family members, household members, sense this coherence.And that increases psychological safety.In teams, this is especially important because in Australia, there is legislation about psychological safety.And that is something that we need to do.and meet a certain standard of and uphold as businesses and organizations in particular, as per legislation.So when you practice this, because some people try to sort of tend to think that these kinds of practices are all, oh, that's so nice to have, good for you, hippy dippy, woo woo bullshit, whatever.No!These are things that actually improve the experience for everyone, but also improve your ability to meet legislative requirements.So, it increases psychological safety.Your decisions are more consistent and values driven and aligned.So there is trust in those decisions.There is usually people are more on board with those decisions, even if it's not ones that they love.So it's more consistent and values driven.Your personal well-being improves.That should be enough also of a reason.We do not need to be as stressed as we are at work.There is a lot in the world right now that is stressful as fuck, but we do not need to be as stressed as we are at work.So this is less cognitive dissonance, lowers stress.Our personal well-being is improved when we practice this, when we do these things.AndIntegration also leads to a more sustainable leadership impact.My whole tagline is impacting positive change.It has been that way since I rebranded in 5 years ago, over 5 years ago.How do we have sustainable and regenerative leadership impact?We focus on that we use integration, instead of relying on the quick fixes that we knowHistorically, either personally, historically, or through examples elsewhere, especially in organizations, we know quick fixes are just band-aids that eventually break and the whole system crumbles.So integration leads to this.It is not just another skill.It is the thread that ties all the other skills together.It is the thing that makes everything else work.It brings it all together.And when leaders integrate who they are and how they lead, you step out of performative leadership, which is a good thing.We don't want to be in performative leadership and actually start embodying it and being it.The world is sick of performative leadership because it's being recognized more and more.I'm sick of performative leadership.You may be sick of performative leadership.So if you are, this is how you can start embodying real leadership.So this week, notice one area where you feel maybe a little split, whether it's head and heart.work or personal any of those examples or something that those examples made you think of and ask what would integration look like here and it might just be a little step it doesn't have to be this whole entire change at once it might just be a little step what would more integration look like here and see how you go with that so thanks for joining me I will see you next week with another brand new episode